Through the years, forums etiquette has nearly written itself with regard
to automotive websites like FordMuscle. One example is, it's a good idea
to keep "thumbs down" opinions about paint color and wheel selection to
yourself when commenting on a fellow Ford enthusiast's ride. Telling
someone in the forums "I wouldn't have chose that wheel" is almost like
saying their wife or girlfriend is ugly... it doesn't do anybody any good.
After all, wheel selection, paint, or any exterior add-ons, are
all a matter of taste, even if you and I both know the offset on those
slot mags are all wrong for the car.
However, leaving proper etiquette on the golf course, some of us are
willing to sacrifice our own popularity for the sake of preventing a fellow
enthusiast from making a fool of themselves. Like me. So after polling some of the FM staff and a few of our regular contributors, here's an unofficial list I gathered of the most uncool wheels for your Ford.
10. Chain Store Universal Wheel Cover
They're available at every auto parts chain store and even Wal-Mart. These ABS plastic wheel covers don't look good on a 1986 Buick Century or even in pieces beside a K-Rail.
Yes, I know I'm going to take some heat for this one. However, these
U.S. Wheel Smoothies are just too "cute as a button" for Ford muscle. Ding Dong.
8. Mustang II Wheel
Like an aborted Magnum 500 conceived by gothic parents, it's fortunate the 4 lug pattern of the Mustang II wheel prevents it from being bolted up to most Fords. Still, these things can find there way onto a Fox body Mustang.
7. Any OEM Mopar Wheel on a Ford
The common 5 on 4.5" bolt pattern of Ford and Mopar can allow for some
wacky interchanges. On rare occassions it can work, but for the most part any Mopar wheel on a Ford usually doesn't pass the test.
6. White 8-Spokes
Another popular model from U.S. Wheel, the White 8-Spoke looks OK
on real off-road 4-wheel drive vehicles, but not on a Ford street machine.
5. Gold and Chrome Directionals
Designed to look fast, "Directionals" are best sent in one direction only...
North of town to the metal recycler.
4. Enkei White Alloys
Retro is cool except when you put these pre-1988 white Enkei alloys on
anything other than a mini-truck or a Saab.
3. Neglected Steel Wheels
I guess rat rods are popular, but when taken to an extreme, pure neglect is very uncool.
2. Chrome Trailer Wheels
At first glance these things look OK but after a bit more study, trailer type wheels are just chrome versions of the off-road oriented White 8-Spokes in number 6 above.
1. Dub Dueces and Beyond
Do I need to say anything?
Top Three "Guilty Pleasures" for Your Ford - Wheels We Hate to Love
The Duke boys used them and so did B.A. Baracus. What's not cool about a Vector? Surprised we don't see them used more often here on FordMuscle.
2. Center Line Auto Drag Wheels
They certainly say 80's but these classic centerlines will always be cool.
1. Slot Mags
Once they were everywhere, now they're not. That's just what makes slot mags the ultimate guilty pleasure in wheel selection.