Through the years, forums etiquette has nearly written itself with regard
to automotive websites like FordMuscle. One example is, it's a good idea
to keep "thumbs down" opinions about paint color and wheel selection to
yourself when commenting on a fellow Ford enthusiast's ride. Telling
someone in the forums "I wouldn't have chose that wheel" is almost like
saying their wife or girlfriend is ugly... it doesn't do anybody any good.
After all, wheel selection, paint, or any exterior add-ons, are
all a matter of taste, even if you and I both know the offset on those
slot mags are all wrong for the car.
However, leaving proper etiquette on the golf course, some of us are
willing to sacrifice our own popularity for the sake of preventing a fellow
enthusiast from making a fool of themselves. Like me. So after polling some of the FM staff and a few of our regular contributors, here's an unofficial list I gathered of the most uncool wheels for your Ford.
10. Chain Store Universal Wheel Cover
They're available at every auto parts chain store and even Wal-Mart. These ABS plastic wheel covers don't look good on a 1986 Buick Century or even in pieces beside a K-Rail.
9. Smoothies
Yes, I know I'm going to take some heat for this one. However, these
U.S. Wheel Smoothies are just too "cute as a button" for Ford muscle. Ding Dong.
8. Mustang II Wheel
Like an aborted Magnum 500 conceived by gothic parents, it's fortunate the 4 lug pattern of the Mustang II wheel prevents it from being bolted up to most Fords. Still, these things can find there way onto a Fox body Mustang.
7. Any OEM Mopar Wheel on a Ford
The common 5 on 4.5" bolt pattern of Ford and Mopar can allow for some
wacky interchanges. On rare occassions it can work, but for the most part any Mopar wheel on a Ford usually doesn't pass the test.
6. White 8-Spokes
Another popular model from U.S. Wheel, the White 8-Spoke looks OK
on real off-road 4-wheel drive vehicles, but not on a Ford street machine.
5. Gold and Chrome Directionals
Designed to look fast, "Directionals" are best sent in one direction only...
North of town to the metal recycler.
4. Enkei White Alloys
Retro is cool except when you put these pre-1988 white Enkei alloys on
anything other than a mini-truck or a Saab.
3. Neglected Steel Wheels
I guess rat rods are popular, but when taken to an extreme, pure neglect is very uncool.
2. Chrome Trailer Wheels
At first glance these things look OK but after a bit more study, trailer type wheels are just chrome versions of the off-road oriented White 8-Spokes in number 6 above.
1. Dub Dueces and Beyond
Do I need to say anything?
Top Three "Guilty Pleasures" for Your Ford - Wheels We Hate to Love
3. Vectors
The Duke boys used them and so did B.A. Baracus. What's not cool about a Vector? Surprised we don't see them used more often here on FordMuscle.
2. Center Line Auto Drag Wheels
They certainly say 80's but these classic centerlines will always be cool.
1. Slot Mags
Once they were everywhere, now they're not. That's just what makes slot mags the ultimate guilty pleasure in wheel selection.
i have to say though, i dont think theres anything to be guilty about when it comes to a set of slot mags.. one of the best looking wheels ever in my opinion.
WAAAYY back in the day, those chrome smoothies were the "thing". Why? Probably because they were a bit difficult to make. One had to have some serious connections to have a stock wheel chromed. They certainly caused a sensation when first seen---whatever that is worth. John--Las Vegas.
I gotta say I agree with your choices Jon... and especially about the "guilty pleasures". I dont mind the chrome smoothies on some cars though. I have seen a lot of examples of modern wheels on a classic car that make you cringe.... a prime example of this is ANY chrome or gold plated "Dub"or "spinner". Whoever came up with these two wagon wheel like monstrosities needs to be beaten with a road-gator until bloody and senseless.
They're not too bad I guess but B.A. Barracus drove a CHEVY and the Duke boy's drove a Mopar... I'd not put them on my Ford for those two simple reasons You did mention something akin to my sentiments in #7 with this one
gotta disagree on at least the Smoothies and Oval slots. both are classic, timeless and 'period correct' for many Fords. i thought you could never go wrong with Centerlines?
does 'Chrome wheels, fuel injected and steppin out over the line' not apply to Fords?
my wheel choice for my 72 Ranchero is Slotted Mopar cop steelies with Baby Moons... is that a 3 strike multiple offense?
i sold my slots and i'm kickin myself, but they were 14's
yeah, the Vectors have kinda been 'niched', and Cragars are kind of a chevy wheel IMO, but the Keystones can look darn good on the right car, even a Ford. i don't believe i've ever heard anybody Eeeew the the Mad Max Interceptor wheels? they look darn close to the spoked/trailer wheels in Black, i don't really care for them much in White but have seen them on a couple cars and yeah, ya know they're cheap but they looked sharp
I have to say that the centerline auto drag ( as long as its a "normal offset") are the some of the best looking. Dated or not! (can you tell im biased???)
Have to agree with the wagon wheel look is just hideious no wheel should ever have gone beyond 19" . And that "stretch a rubber band around the wheel" on ANY rim is just stupid. Even race cars dont have aspect ratios that low...
You forgot i think the single most un-cool wheel.
Spinner anything.....
I love Slot Mags!!!
Ansen Sprints are my favorites.
If they made them for my 05 they would be on it.
Not yet though.
But like was mentioned it is a matter of personal taste.
I get discouraged myself looking for wheels.
The newer Space Wheels as I call em just don't appeal to me.
And the Wagon Wheels...
Well that's a whole different rant.
Through the years, forums etiquette has nearly written itself with regard to automotive websites like FordMuscle. One example is, it's a good idea to keep "thumbs down" opinions about paint color and wheel selection to yourself when commenting on a fellow Ford enthusiast's ride.
Telling someone in the forums "I wouldn't have chose that wheel" is almost like saying their wife or girlfriend is ugly...
9. Smoothies
8. Mustang II Wheel
Like an aborted Magnum 500 conceived by gothic parents, it's fortunate the 4 lug pattern of the Mustang II wheel prevents it from being bolted up to most Fords. Still, these things can find there way onto a Fox body Mustang.
on some cars I like the slots and cragers...on most older ones , I still like the simple chrome reverse(but not a big fan of the smoothie center or full wheel covers).
my favorite for 'sporty' cars will always be the torq-thrust-d, long as the face is fairly deep. for a more 'formal' looking car, I still love the 93-98 CV/Marquis deep dished 'handling package' 16x7s...was really happy with how they looked on our 65 4 door- tried torq-thrusts on it, just didnt agree with me for some reason...
favorite GM wheels(sorry, just had to throw them in too) is the 15x8 corvette rallye with rings/caps, or the GTA firebird...never saw a car I didnt think looked 'better' with either of those
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